The year that was flew by, and the new year is here. That was pretty quick, I have to say, and as I look back on the past few months I couldn’t help but think of what I have accomplished:

• I was invited to be a part of gallery show in AG Gallery in Brooklyn, and you can see some of my work there until the 25th of this month. I’ll also be participating in artesprit’s gallery in the next coming months, so I’ll be preparing for that too.
• Pikaland is going really well, and there’s new ideas and projects a-brimming. I’ve made lots of friends and seen lots of beautiful art. We had great reviews and lots of linkbacks from other great blogs too. The best part is when an artist comes up to me and tells me that they’ve sold their entire collection, or that they’ve made their first sale because of the exposure.
• My first collaboration with Dawanda — a competition!
• I sold my first zine and I can’t wait to draw some more!
• My articles have appeared in various magazines, and I’ve also written a few for the largest circulating daily newspaper here in Malaysia.
• I illustrated the opening chapters (all 20 of them!) for Adeline’s book which was published a few months ago.
• My trip to Kyoto unearthed a deep appreciation of yoghurt + cereal, flea markets and salsa dancing.
• On the personal front, I’m now in my new house with a permanent working corner which I love. Living like a nomadic worker at my old house — with stationery and equipment strewn here and there does not make one an effective worker! I love how now I am able to organize my own space.

There’s many more that I missed I’m sure, but all in all? It was a fantastic year, and I look forward to what 2009 will bring!

How is your new year coming along?

Many years ago, when we were still teenagers, my best friend C and I were talking about what we wanted to do when we grew up. She wanted to travel the world and I wanted to be a magazine editor. Our dreams came true, despite our various situations — she didn’t have the money to travel, and I did not hold necessary qualifications that would make me one up for the job.

I look back fondly over the last few years when I became involved with publishing, and the chances that I took when I was climbing the ladder. And somehow after four years I am wondering to myself whether it was an accidental career that chose me instead of the other way around.

After reading a post by this lady I started thinking of the various paths that I might have carved out for myself had I not been in publishing:

1. Artist/illustrator
2. Art gallery curator/owner
3. Florist
4. Pilates instructor
5. Surface designer
6. Costume designer
7. Calligrapher
8. Interior designer
9. Creative Director in an advertising agency
10. Ballet dancer

Of course, being a magazine editor was an important part of that list — I just never thought that it would end so soon (clearly by my own choice, though I had wonderful opportunities in the form of my last employer who believed in me). I just thought that it was time to move on after listening long and hard at what my heart was telling me.

I thought I was on my way, until one day as I was having lunch with a friend, R, who casually mentioned, “since it’s very clear that you love art more than writing, shouldn’t you concentrate more on your art as a means of earning a living, as opposed to writing?”

Her statement stuck with me for the longest time, because right now I freelance as a magazine/newspaper writer, and I also have a part time job as a writer/editor, along with Pikaland, which leaves me very little time for my own self-development. As my pace slowed down during these few days after weeks of rushing one deadline after the next, I am again haunted by what she had said — it made me think hard; resonating in me the missing link that I had never thought was absent in the first place.

Perhaps she was right. Maybe I am still scared of fully immersing myself in just making. Maybe it’s my fear that I might find out that I have nothing much to say or to express. Maybe I’m scared of the bills I have to pay? Or maybe I’m still just chicken? Or maybe i just need a shift in direction; a corrective measure made to my sails as I go through the murky waters of self-discovery that I’m currently bobbing about in.

p/s—what about you? Do you ever think of where you might land if you weren’t doing what you are doing right now?

It’s going to be my birthday in a couple of weeks, and it’s the first one since my marriage registration in September. This year is a year of happenings, of leaps into the unknown and of overcoming fears and adversity.

It has been a year of growth.

I’m moving into my new home by December. I now write for a few magazines and a newspaper and I have more than enough to help me through each month. I have a few wonderful projects in the pipeline that makes me anxious to start each day. I made a lot of new friends offline and online, and I’ve learned how to think more creatively ever since I’ve had to depend on myself to put food on the table.

It wasn’t easy, and I’m so grateful for all the help I’ve received. I’m sure there will be trying times ahead; roadblocks and disappointments aplenty. No one is immune, and certainly not me. But I’m finally beginning to settle into my new routine and enjoy my very packed days after the first few emotionally confusing months. Leaping off the proverbial cliff was one of the biggest fears of my life, but I know now that jumping off was the only way I could learn how to fly.

Watercolor + ink on watercolor paper.

I’ve forgotten how much lines mean to me. More to come.

I wrote a little post on Pikaland about LONO, a shop in Japan, where the illustrator draws on dolls. Click here to read more if you’re into that sort of thing.

It’s been a week since I’m back, and while some of my work is winding up, I have some new ones in as well. I’m eager to get everything out of the way, so that I can embark on a personal create-a-thing-a-day month (without actually being on the website — I love the idea, but I don’t want to wait until February next year.)

Although technically I shouldn’t have to wait for everything to wind up before I can embark on it, it’s just a quirk of mine to want to clear the table, before I sit down for a feast.

Along with my friend’s camera in hand, a month away from home trained my eye to be more keenly aware of my surroundings. I started noticing the shapes and lines of things, and how they are connected to each other. I started taking photographs of color, numbers, words, lines and shapes — no matter if at that moment they seemed to not have any connection between them.

My only fear are the moments and places that I couldn’t capture on camera will be forgotten. It’s a thought that’s hardest to bear.

I’ve been back for a couple of days now, and I am very quickly getting into the swing of things. An illustration project (where I am tethering too close to the deadline!) and the PikaPackage Project keeps me busy, as I tie up several loose ends here and there too.

It dawned on me, as I sit here working on my dining table with a cup of tea, that I am now living out my dream of being a freelance writer/illustrator; and to be able to work on one of my biggest pride of all — Pikaland — has made me realize how lucky I am to have an opportunity such as this.

While I do say that luck has played a part, I believe it is a culmination of several different paths which I have taken over the course of several years that has led me to this. There was a lot of sweat, tears and joy as I traverse through untrodden path, and it wasn’t only my belief in myself that kept me going; the faith of others pushed me through as well, and this has played a big part of how I am able to push myself against the hamster’s wheel and break free.

Thank you for everyone’s comments on my Illustration Friday theme last week — it does feel good again to be able to participate.

And oh, Opportunity, if you’re listening — I’m open. :)

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I wrote a short intro to the shopping haven on Sanjo and Shijo-dori in Kyoto on Bloesom’s World Tour ; thank you Irene for inviting me! {We should probably be doing one about KL very soon!}

Drawn on the fly with a fat calligraphy pen. It’s interesting to get to know a new member of the family — my pencil box family, that is.

I noticed something as I walked outside today, along the Philosophers Path (what irony!).

We’re constantly bombarded with trivial issues — TV shows, movies, entertainment gossip, mindless commercials, etc; that all these seem to pass into our brain and exits just as quickly — without leaving a mark; without ever being useful.

If we’re constantly being nonchalant about all these useless information, what will we do when there’s real information to be gleaned? When there’s a real gem waiting to be discovered — a life’s lesson perhaps? Will we be able to sieve through it, or will we just let it slip, just as we do with all the crap that we have to face everyday?

I turn and I see… patterns everywhere.
Each a repetition, a dance, an interplay of textures.
How wonderful to open your eyes and see afresh new possibilities and beauty in the everyday.

For the days when the rain won’t seem to let up, and the sun refuses to shine, I know there are people out there who are waiting for me with an umbrella and a blanket, hands outstretched, and hugs to make it all feel better.

Thank you.

More inspiration here, and in Marisa’s podcasts.